Great post, it is a struggle to give myself credit for what I've done and not judge myself on not things I've not managed! Totally understand your thoughts!
Hi Amanda, I am very sorry to hear about your sister-in-law, it sounds very serious. You are amazingly kind and compassionate to go to such effort and spend so much time making sure that you are there for your sister-in-law as much as you can. In itself this would do me in, so the fact that you still managing to engage in all the many ways you have listed above is incredible! Please give yourself a pat on the back from me, and continue to look after your own needs for, as you said, unless you look after yourself you won't be able to take care of others. Mind yourself dear Amanda. xx
Sometimes I think that achieving is similar to acquiring. The older I get, the more I want to simplify, and that means not only getting rid of all the clutter and stuff, but also simplifying my schedule. Obviously that’s not easy when you need to make money.
Recently, I went to see a friend who wanted me to do a little bit of remodeling in his house. He lives 45 minutes away. When I got there, we had a nice visit and then he showed me how he had done the work himself. He didn’t need me anymore . That would have been a paying job, but boy did I feel relieved!
I do have other jobs though. In fact, right now I’m sitting in my truck taking a break from the porch replacement job that I mentioned in my last essay. But I will tell you, it’s taking me about four times longer than it would have in past years! (that’s not reflected in the bill ha ha, it’s my loss. But not really a loss because this is such a beautiful lakeside job site.)
Just rambling, Amanda. I hope you find peace with your own schedule. I’m sending you good vibes.🙏💚
Thanks for the good vibes, Don. Yes I try to keep things as simple as possible too. But sometimes life doesn’t play along! I think I’ve decided to just let the Tao of Storytelling go. As much as I enjoy it when I do it, I just don’t have the time or headspace right now. But all the rest is how I earn a living so I’ve got to, and want to, do it all. And usually it’s not a problem at all fitting it in but I’ve had a lot of time off in the past couple of months.
I hear you, Amanda. It’s tough to find a balance. And I know what you mean too about enjoying something once you finally get to it. I even enjoy doing my bills when I finally get to them! But ugh do I feel overwhelmed by the pile when I don’t get to it!
Thank you for this post, Amanda! Life is asking you to take care of what is most pressing in the moment. It’s family right now.
I struggle with making time to just do nothing. Lately, I have decided to do nothing on my days off. Life is asking me to slow down, and spend time in self-care. I understand your thoughts as well.
Doing nothing on your days off is a good plan! Looking after ourselves is vital despite the world we live in expecting us to be busy and productive all the time. Enjoy your slow days 💙
Sending you a big hug, Amanda, you've had so much with your sister-in-law's illness. I am feeling behind too because of things that needed doing, and treading carefully to stay on the compassion-to-self side of the fence.
Thank you for this beautiful reminder! I'm compassionate to myself in most moments, but reading this post made me realize that I sometimes sort of sneakily pinch and jab myself over the to-do list items that I haven't gotten to. I immediately get an image of my own kids, who take these sneaky little jabs and pinches at each other that they think I won't notice. That's how my self-criticism shows up - not as big, obvious punches. It's this much quieter (and therefore possibly more insidious), subtler sort of attack. Thank you for your thoughtful post, which helped me to recognize this! Also, I'm wishing healing for your sister-in-law and strength for all of you.
I hear you, and I feel you. You have my deepest compassion, without question. I know all too well what it's like when drama comes knocking, especially over the past year since my mother's pancreatic cancer diagnosis. She passed three weeks ago today. The treatment she received prolonged her life but only maintained a sort of status quo.
Our relationship was complicated, especially after she entered into a new marriage just weeks before she died—something I didn’t even know about. But now, it doesn’t really matter. She always lived her life on her own terms, which I respect, though it’s confusing when that person is your role model for motherhood.
I've been procrastinating—I'm not sure how long I've been working on my memoir. Lately, I find myself branching out into poetry and essays. And then there’s the second edition of my first book, Being Eclipsed: Women under the ‘Care’ of the Patriarchy to align it with the Audiobook. I really want to finish it, to finally get it done, but something keeps pulling me back. It feels like there’s still more to learn, more to heal.
So yes, I understand. The struggle is real, and we need to remind ourselves who we are and what truly matters to our hearts. ❤️
You have my deepest compassion too, DD. I don’t think it sounds like you’re procrastinating. You’re following your creative heart and working on what feels right for now. 💙
I do try...I'm 92, so have a few 'mindful areas' - BP and knees...I have always been fairly mindful as I am a curious person, like learning and generally... am fond of people and fascinated by them. I also like exercising the limited mind I have. Joy Lennick
I wouldn’t have been able to hack into my partners instagram and snapchat without the help of (spyrecovery36 at gm ail c om ) I had a hard time finding the right hacker who could pull it off without my husband noticing what was going on, This hacker has great reviews and I have come in contact with people who has used his service successfully and he delivered. He is the best amongst them and his services were splendid and the cost was effective. i highly recommend this hacker
Great post, it is a struggle to give myself credit for what I've done and not judge myself on not things I've not managed! Totally understand your thoughts!
Sadly, we’re conditioned to judge ourselves harshly. When in fact, we’re all doing amazing! Well done you! 💙
Conditioning has a lot to say for itself! Thanks and well done to you too! x
Hi Amanda, I am very sorry to hear about your sister-in-law, it sounds very serious. You are amazingly kind and compassionate to go to such effort and spend so much time making sure that you are there for your sister-in-law as much as you can. In itself this would do me in, so the fact that you still managing to engage in all the many ways you have listed above is incredible! Please give yourself a pat on the back from me, and continue to look after your own needs for, as you said, unless you look after yourself you won't be able to take care of others. Mind yourself dear Amanda. xx
Thanks Edith. I’m taking it easy right now. On the sofa, feet up, under a blanket 💙
Sometimes I think that achieving is similar to acquiring. The older I get, the more I want to simplify, and that means not only getting rid of all the clutter and stuff, but also simplifying my schedule. Obviously that’s not easy when you need to make money.
Recently, I went to see a friend who wanted me to do a little bit of remodeling in his house. He lives 45 minutes away. When I got there, we had a nice visit and then he showed me how he had done the work himself. He didn’t need me anymore . That would have been a paying job, but boy did I feel relieved!
I do have other jobs though. In fact, right now I’m sitting in my truck taking a break from the porch replacement job that I mentioned in my last essay. But I will tell you, it’s taking me about four times longer than it would have in past years! (that’s not reflected in the bill ha ha, it’s my loss. But not really a loss because this is such a beautiful lakeside job site.)
Just rambling, Amanda. I hope you find peace with your own schedule. I’m sending you good vibes.🙏💚
Thanks for the good vibes, Don. Yes I try to keep things as simple as possible too. But sometimes life doesn’t play along! I think I’ve decided to just let the Tao of Storytelling go. As much as I enjoy it when I do it, I just don’t have the time or headspace right now. But all the rest is how I earn a living so I’ve got to, and want to, do it all. And usually it’s not a problem at all fitting it in but I’ve had a lot of time off in the past couple of months.
I hear you, Amanda. It’s tough to find a balance. And I know what you mean too about enjoying something once you finally get to it. I even enjoy doing my bills when I finally get to them! But ugh do I feel overwhelmed by the pile when I don’t get to it!
Thank you for this post, Amanda! Life is asking you to take care of what is most pressing in the moment. It’s family right now.
I struggle with making time to just do nothing. Lately, I have decided to do nothing on my days off. Life is asking me to slow down, and spend time in self-care. I understand your thoughts as well.
Doing nothing on your days off is a good plan! Looking after ourselves is vital despite the world we live in expecting us to be busy and productive all the time. Enjoy your slow days 💙
Self-compassion is something I regularly struggle with, but with practice, I'm slowly moving in the right direction.
That’s good to hear, Derek. Keep going that way!
Sending you a big hug, Amanda, you've had so much with your sister-in-law's illness. I am feeling behind too because of things that needed doing, and treading carefully to stay on the compassion-to-self side of the fence.
Thanks Fran. Hugging you right back 💙
Thank you for this beautiful reminder! I'm compassionate to myself in most moments, but reading this post made me realize that I sometimes sort of sneakily pinch and jab myself over the to-do list items that I haven't gotten to. I immediately get an image of my own kids, who take these sneaky little jabs and pinches at each other that they think I won't notice. That's how my self-criticism shows up - not as big, obvious punches. It's this much quieter (and therefore possibly more insidious), subtler sort of attack. Thank you for your thoughtful post, which helped me to recognize this! Also, I'm wishing healing for your sister-in-law and strength for all of you.
Thanks Lisa. Yes I think those sneaky little jabs are the ones we need to watch out for!
Amanda, You are amazing! I am exhausted just thinking about your list and all that is going on with you. My only word of advice- Breathe. D
Thanks Dave. I’m doing lots of deep slow breathing! 💙
I hear you, and I feel you. You have my deepest compassion, without question. I know all too well what it's like when drama comes knocking, especially over the past year since my mother's pancreatic cancer diagnosis. She passed three weeks ago today. The treatment she received prolonged her life but only maintained a sort of status quo.
Our relationship was complicated, especially after she entered into a new marriage just weeks before she died—something I didn’t even know about. But now, it doesn’t really matter. She always lived her life on her own terms, which I respect, though it’s confusing when that person is your role model for motherhood.
I've been procrastinating—I'm not sure how long I've been working on my memoir. Lately, I find myself branching out into poetry and essays. And then there’s the second edition of my first book, Being Eclipsed: Women under the ‘Care’ of the Patriarchy to align it with the Audiobook. I really want to finish it, to finally get it done, but something keeps pulling me back. It feels like there’s still more to learn, more to heal.
So yes, I understand. The struggle is real, and we need to remind ourselves who we are and what truly matters to our hearts. ❤️
You have my deepest compassion too, DD. I don’t think it sounds like you’re procrastinating. You’re following your creative heart and working on what feels right for now. 💙
I do try...I'm 92, so have a few 'mindful areas' - BP and knees...I have always been fairly mindful as I am a curious person, like learning and generally... am fond of people and fascinated by them. I also like exercising the limited mind I have. Joy Lennick
I wouldn’t have been able to hack into my partners instagram and snapchat without the help of (spyrecovery36 at gm ail c om ) I had a hard time finding the right hacker who could pull it off without my husband noticing what was going on, This hacker has great reviews and I have come in contact with people who has used his service successfully and he delivered. He is the best amongst them and his services were splendid and the cost was effective. i highly recommend this hacker
Beautiful