Accept and be happy

Learning to embrace what is

Apologies for the long gap between posts. I’ve been resting and recovering from the shock of losing my mother-in-law suddenly and, I’ve realised recently, also from the 16 other bereavements in the past seven years and becoming estranged from my family in 2017. It had all taken a toll but I’d taken it in my stride mainly. But being here in Greece gave me space and time, and a beautiful place, to walk further along the path of healing.

Several times I thought I must write something for my Substack, what about my paid subscribers? I owe them my posts. But there are only five of them and most of them are my friends so I figured they’d understand. I hope you do.

The six weeks I’ve spent here have been transformative in many ways. As the title of this post says, I’ve come to a new state of acceptance and that has made me feel happier. It’s an ongoing journey though, and there will always be a next step that has to be taken. But for now, I feel that some important alchemy has happened in my heart and mind.

I’ve re-embraced my nomadic nature and instead of focusing on trying to find this elusive “long-term home” I’m setting myself free to roam again. Many of the things I’ve learned in a 20-year career writing about environmental sustainability, and since embarking on a spiritual journey in 2016, have lead me to believe that we’re living in the end times for our civilisation. Our way of life simply cannot be sustained. So before the time comes when we cannot so easily go and see different places, I’m going exploring.

How do I justify this travel when I’ve spent so long writing about sustainability? Because through that work I know that the aviation sector is responsible for a small percentage of emissions compared to industrial manufacturing and meat production. I’m not a shopper, virtually every item of clothing I own fits in my backpack and several of them I’ve owned for more than eight years. I don’t eat meat. I don’t have a home and I haven’t created any more humans. I feel like I’m balancing it out. And, after reading Satya’s post “You Do Not Have To Be Good” I realised I don’t actually have to justify it to anyone, including myself. I’m doing my best.

I’m blessed to have been born into a time when travelling is accessible to me even though I’m not wealthy. I’m blessed to be able to take my work with me wherever I go. My husband has recently qualified as an entry-level qigong instructor, and has started on the next stage, so he can now do the same. We’re free to roam. So we’re loading up our backpacks again and are heading West. To the American continent, somewhere I’ve never been. We’re doing our exploring through housesitting so it’s affordable and so we can stay in neighbourhoods and experience real life in places, rather than hitting tourist trails and staying in hotels.

We’ve got a 2.5 month stay in Canada to start with, in British Columbia, and are heading there in early September. We haven’t decided where we’re going after that yet. But having just spent six weeks basking in the healing rays of warm sunshine and swimming in the sea, it’s likely to be a lot further south than Canada for the winter!

This new space in my head and heart has let more stories come in too. Since arriving in Greece, I’ve read two novels and two short story collections. I only read about that many in the whole of last year. I’ve got many new story ideas of my own bouncing around my brain. I’ll write one of them soon, probably. I also did final edits on a couple of older stories and submitted them to journals. The first time I’ve sent my stories out in the world in almost a year. One has been declined by them all and I’m still waiting for a response on the other. But I’m fine with that too. I’m accepting what is and feeling happy.